- 7 of 7 - Self-Stigma
December 3 each year is celebrated as the International Day of Persons with Disabilities. This day aims to promote the rights and well-being of persons with disabilities. I chose to connect my research of self-stigma with disabilities because I wanted to learn specifically about the thoughts, feelings, and emotions my mom might have internalized living her entire life with one full arm and one partial arm. Don’t get me wrong, having one hand never defined my mom and she firmly believed she was not disabled nor handicapped. Regardless of her convictions, she was not immune from self-stigma, and after conducting this research, I have a much better sense of what she might have experienced.
Self-stigma happens when a person accepts public stigma. Simply put, you may begin to consider your own traits or symptoms “shameful” and deserving of criticism, or believe you’ve earned negative judgment because of them. For example, a person may consider themselves weak for having post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), especially when questioned if they are overreacting to the trauma experienced. Another example is my mom’s situation and others born with a physical disability that might fear being seen as incapable or different by others. The fears, shame, and disgrace imparted by self-stigma can lead to feelings of low self-esteem, self-worth, and self-usefulness.
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), 61 million adults in the United States live with a disability. That’s roughly 26 percent of adults living in the United States, and like many statistics relating to stigma, it is underrepresented due to the shame and disgrace of being labeled. Furthermore, there are several negative impacts from self-stigma as described by the University of Washington Healthy Aging and Physical Disability Rehabilitation Research and Training Center, including:
Social Avoidance – People with disabilities may be left out of social activities, or they may find that friends become more distant after they develop a disability. People may be hesitant to make eye contact or start a conversation with someone who has a visible disability.
Stereotyping – People with disabilities may be presumed to be helpless, unable to care for themselves, or unable to make their own decisions. People with one disability, such as a speech impairment, may be presumed to have other disabilities they don’t have, such as an intellectual disability.
Discrimination – People with disabilities may be denied jobs, housing, or other opportunities due to false assumptions or stereotypes about disabilities. This still occurs today, despite disability rights laws such as the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA).
Condescension – People with disabilities may be coddled or over-protected due to perceptions of their helplessness.
Blaming – People may be blamed for their disability or accused of using their disability to gain unfair benefits.
Internalization – People with disabilities may themselves adopt negative beliefs about their disability and feel ashamed or embarrassed about it.
Hate Crimes and Violence – People with disabilities may be targeted in hate crimes. They are more likely to be victims of physical or sexual violence than people without disabilities.
Growing my knowledge about self-stigma and learning more about these harmful potential outcomes, I have a deeper appreciation of my mom’s fortitude despite public perceptions and her openness to “never by afraid to try” and live life by the adage, “where there’s a will, there’s a way.” Living life with these guideposts provided her a way to dispel negative public perceptions related to people with physical disabilities and her daily actions squashed self-stigma, doubt, and low self-esteem. I am sure she had her own self-pity moments as we all do. However, my exploration of self-stigma and its harmful effects has showcased the following attributes my mother leaned on and instilled in me to protect against the negative impacts of self-stigma and be a resource to help others in their own trials, as well:
Never be afraid to try – take a moment to imagine living a single day of your life with one hand – tie your shoes, zip up your coat, cut a steak, and the list goes on. What about one day in a wheelchair? Without sight or hearing? How would you move beyond fears and statements of “I can’t” to overcome challenges?
Where there’s a will, there’s a way – Six years ago, my dominant thumb was severely injured and for 6 months I had a small dose of life with one hand. Thanks to having a one-handed mother as a role model, my temporary disability was not an excuse but gamified overcoming obstacles to my daily activities.
Make eye contact and start a conversation – don’t be afraid to make eye contact or talk to a person with a disability. The same statements of “how’s the weather?” and “how’s your day going?” still apply. If the person is uncomfortable talking, then stop.
Offer help – this may seem obvious; however, the extremes for offering help can range from pushing help on folks that don’t need/want it to not offering help at all. Either end of the spectrum can have negative impacts. Simply, offer help without pushing and without discrimination – meaning offer to anyone who needs help, not just to those with disabilities.
My exploration of self-stigma and experiences my mom may have encountered has been enlightening in many ways. Connie Hatter was a generous person that positively impacted lives and accomplished more with one hand, than most people could with two hands. I hope you enjoyed this summary of information and if you missed any of the other 7 types of stigmas, check out #MissionStigmaFree.
Enjoy the day!